Counting the Days

I haven't posted in, like, forever... Which is approximately five days, lol.

Anyhow, as you can assume from the title school is starting soon for me, on this Thursday. Yuck. The thought of it really makes me wanna vomit. Well, not actually- I'm being a bit dramatic, but yeah, not so excited.

I just really don't want to have to say hi to so many people. It sounds overwhelming to me. However, I've decided I'm going to be different this year. I'll say hi to who I want, when I want, say anything I want to also... Basically, I'm going to (try to) not care about what others think.

Actually, cross off the try to in parenthesis. I have to, because if I don't I'll always be lonely, with no good friends. I'll always feel like an outcast, like I'm a weirdo. I have to learn not to care what others think about me.

But yeah, it's kind of taxing just thinking about it. I'm still going to do it, even if I don't want to, but I worry deep down that I may give up or not go through with it. But then I have to throw those thoughts away, because you know, if I worry I'll probably do worse than I would not being anxious about it.

And the thought of being there for almost 7 hours and having to do work, having not much time makes me wanna curl into a ball and cry.

On the bright side, though, I'm kind of excited to make new friends, and especially get closer to my brother's cute friend. He's in a singing group with me. In fact, he asked if I'm going to join again this year, and after I said yeah, he told me "I better". Wonder what that means... :D (yeah, I kind of love him. No judging!)

Also, like the geek I am, I'm excited to see my new classes and buy supplies and stuff.. And clothing shopping, of course. I actually got this really cute Kimono from Sears that I will wear the hell out of.

Maybe this school year will be better.. Well, I'm sure it will, since I'm going to not care as much.

How are you guys doinnn?

-Bean